Three (MEGA) Tips for Creating that AWESOME Personal Network.

"It's not what you know, it's who you know".

How many times have you heard that phrase?

Has that phrase ever frustrated you because you didn't feel like you 'knew' anyone?

All is not lost. Making connections and knowing people isn't just about being born in the right family or going to the right school.  It can also be a result of proactively cultivating a group of people around you who are not only a great support network, but encourage and inspire your growth.

Wondering how to get there? Well, here are a few steps to get you started...

***

1. Go to all the random events related to your sector (and then TALK to people!)

I have lost count of the number of random events I have attended (quite often by myself) because I wanted to learn something or thought it would be useful. These talks, conferences and breakfasts were the are how I started to cultivate a support network within the worlds I was interested in.

Start with the professional body for your sector. In engineering for example, the first port of call would be the Engineers Australia website and event page.

The next step would be to register for all the events you are interested in or have interesting people speaking.

If you are nervous at the prospect of going alone, perhaps take a friend or work colleague.

It always helps if you arrive earlier, as the room will fill around you. Also, if there are only three people in the room, you're likely to end up talking to each other.

Suppress the urge to nurse a drink and stand in a corner. Remember everyone is there to meet people too! They won't mind if you strike up a conversation. If you are finding it difficult, start with the basics:

• Open with something about the event - it is a good common ground to talk about (you're both there for a reason after all!)
• Ask where they are from or what they do, and pay attention to the answer! (Not only is that respectful and you might learn something new, but it always helps down the line)
• If you walk into a room by yourself and everyone is already in small groups, you can always try catching the eye of someone and asking "do you guys mind if I join in?". More often than not they will be more than happy to bring you into the fold and they will already be talking about a topic ("so what were you guys talking about?") so you're all set!

***

2. Get in contact with the people you met within three days.

So you've attended your event, you have a couple of key business cards and email addresses, the next step is to actually follow up!

Within three days is usually ideal - they shouldn't have forgotten you by then. A short email of introduction usually works, with perhaps a link to something useful or a reference to something you discussed. For example...

"Hi Mr M&M,

I hope this email finds you well! Just a quick note to say that it was fantastic meeting at the Engineers Australia talk on Monday night. It was great having a chat to you about the developments in the gas industry in Queensland; I definitely learnt a lot! I particularly enjoyed your comments about the importance of a company's social licence to operate.

I actually came across this link about gas developments on Curtis Island yesterday that I thought you might be interested in.

Anyhow, I would love to stay in touch - perhaps we can catch up for a coffee sometime in the next few weeks?

I look forward to hearing from you soon.

Kindest regards..."

Short, sweet, and to the point.

***

3. Stay in contact with them!

One of the best pieces of advice I got about keeping my network alive was to send people postcards on my trips to stay on people's radar. This works particularly well with busier people who might meet thousands of new people a year!

Emailing the person right after you meet them is all well and good, but the key is in developing that relationship. In that first email, offer to shout them a coffee, and then organise a time and follow through.

Even if you are completely scared and not sure what you would talk about, just ask to catch up! I once asked a random Head of Mechanical Engineering of a company out for a coffee after an event I attended. It lead to a job offer. You won't know if you don't try...

If that makes you uncomfortable or isn't feasible, at least stay in contact with them via email, phone or letter.

What I usually do is meet up with the person within a month or two, and then send a 'catch up' email or card at least once or twice a year. It may not sound like much, but it is all about maintaining that network and keeping it alive.

Sending a hand written card is a surefire way to get yourself noticed and remembered. Festive seasons are also a great time to send cards to your networks and friends. Get creative...

I love writing cards to people, and the hand written note is usually appreciated. It adds a personal touch, and is uncommon enough that it won't get lost in the black holes of inboxes. That is if you send it to the correct address of course...

***

At the end of the day, remember that everyone you meet is a human being. We all are people with stories, personalities, likes, dislikes, ideas and experiences. The way I see it, 'networking' is a dry and impersonal term for 'meeting new people' or 'making friends' - making friends with cool, interesting, random people who operate in similar (or very different) circles to your own.

Some people see it differently - they see 'networking' as a purely focused or business based exercise. Perhaps...

In my opinion though, you shouldn't go to an event soley to 'network', you should go to learn something, meet new people and gain an experience. If you come out from the event with a few cards and a lead for a job that is great, but there is so much more in valuing each and every experience and person you meet on their own merits, and not on what they can offer you.  Remember, it's not all about you either.  Make sure you give back!  That's a whole other blog post though...

So get out there, have some fun and meet new people! What are your tips?

Women in the Workforce: More to it Than Just Numbers

  I wrote this piece for FutureChallenges.org, an awesome site. Check it out originally here.

***

The questions of women in the workforce and how that affects society’s fabric have been posed since the early days of the feminist movement.  The question of what is gained – or lost – as women assume a larger role in a country’s economic burden is not so much just about the economic aspect, but spans the issues of the political, social and cultural impacts as well.

Women on the job in Afghanistan, by United Nations Photo, on Flickr, 2012 CC BY-NC-ND 2.0

As a young woman growing up in a Western country with heritage and cultural influences from the East, the question of women’s role in society more broadly has been of interest. The different cultural expectations of women, and the interestingly underlying and sometimes unexpected similarities give an indication of how far women have come, but also how far we still have to go.

In terms of what is gained, there is much to be said. From a numbers point of view, between 1984 and 2009, the number of working women has increased from 44 million to 72 million (in the US).  Not only do the sheer numbers of individuals contributing to the workforce make a difference, but women are said to bring particular skills to industry that change the tone.

Women are said to be more intuitive with different values, including empathy and support.  They are also said to be better team players and are able to look at problems more holistically.  On a more extreme level, workers in traditionally male dominated industries such as oil rigs have anecdotally welcomed women as they “make it seem more like the real world” and “bring a different mentality so we even end up talking about different things”.

These are all sweeping generalisations though; can it really be said that “all women are empathetic” and that is why they are good for the marketplace?  Is it fair to pigeon hole an entire gender into an expected set of stereotyped values?

Perhaps these generalisations are more damaging than beneficial and are part of the reason women are thought of in a particular way, limiting their ability to contribute in a meaningful manner.

An interesting article on the Financial Times also questions this focus on “what women bring”, concluding that perhaps it just comes down to the skill set of the individual and this is where the focus should remain. This particularly applies to women in senior and leadership positions in companies.

Or to put it another way, the women who “make it” perhaps do so because they are far better than the men. It might mean the focus should be less on “what women bring” and more on getting them into leadership roles in the first place.  (Source)

Generalisations aside though, the increase in the number and proportion of women in the workforce does have implications on society more generally. There is no more obvious platform for this societal shift than of the oft asked question “Can women have it all”. Interestingly, it is a question posed usually by women themselves.

“Busy Mom”, by gwilmore, on Flickr, 2005, CC BY-NC-SA 2.0

Anne Marie Slaughter’s well read essay in the Atlantic, “Why Women Still Can’t Have it All” in 2012 was a profound example of an ambitious, accomplished female role model who argued that women weren’t able to have it all – ‘all’ meaning an ambitious career and a fulfilling family life. The article, based on Slaughter’s personal life as a senior US Department of State employee, provoked responses from around the globe and shocked many, opening up a public conversation about what the result of having women in the workforce meant for our society.

It would seem that from a purely economic point of view, having women a part of the workforce and contributing to nation building in a corporate sense does nothing but improve, gain, increase and enrich productivity and our work place environment. Where things are perhaps lost is not in the office or on site but outside that world – in homes and within families. This is not to say that having women in the workforce is purely detrimental to families, but that society needs to accommodate the fact that women spend more time away from the home and the resultant shift needs to be accounted and allowed for. Society has accepted that women are part and parcel of the working world, now the cultural change needs to follow so that the overall outcome is of one positive benefit for all.

Women collectively breastfeeding for IWD – the right to work and family, by Amadeus Sanz, on Flickr, 2008 CC BY-NC-SA 2.0

Sometimes images like this suggest that even with women in the workforce and contributing to our society, mentalities still have a way to go.